A Breezy Pregnancy: How I Did It

Rachel here! Wildly, it is already September, which means Ember will be here THIS MONTH! As I take time to reflect on what this journey has been like for us, something continues to stay top of mind: I have been one blessed mama-to-be when it comes to my pregnancy experience. Seriously. On numerous occasions I have been likened to the annoyingly perfectly pregnant Mother-in-Law in the What to Expect movie (minus wearing high heels and having rockin' abs, I never had those pre-pregnancy!), and folks aren't exactly wrong.

Because of that, I've gotten a lot of, "How?!" queries - especially by those that know how tumultuous my health and wellness journey has been. PCOS, high testosterone, then high estrogen, non-existent levels of natural progesterone, unexpected hormone shifts, morbid obesity... that medical history doesn't exactly scream AWESOME PREGNANCY! Yet, here we are.

It is not lost on me that there are tons of women that have the opposite experience while they go through their own pregnancies, which is why I haven't spent a ton of time talking about it - always thinking the rug would eventually be pulled out from under me and I'd go to having the more expected (and constantly talked about) negative pregnancy. Now that we're into the 38th Week, though, I think it's safe to say that we've made it, and I feel comfortable sharing what tips I believe have contributed most to my own positive experience.

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Stay active, but listen to your body!

A couple things to preface here:

• I was already very active when I got pregnant with an established work out routine, so this was easier for me to maintain vs. having to start from scratch!

• Learning to actually LISTEN to your body and respond to its needs takes time - at least it did for me.

• In summary, if you can, try to start getting active and learning to read your body PRIOR to TTC. It will pay you back in dividends later. BUT EVEN IF YOU DON'T DO THIS BEFOREHAND, IT IS STILL WORTH STARTING EARLY IN PREGNANCY!

So what does "stay active, but listen to your body" even mean? Well, it honestly means different things depending on who you are, so take my perspective as just that - my perspective.

For me, staying active meant I continued my work out routine, including teaching my fitness class all the way through my pregnancy (with doctor approval). I, of course, made modifications as needed, but most everything stayed the same.

Continuing my Yoga practice (especially restorative) was SO IMPORTANT for maintaining a flexible, strong body and mind specifically. The breathing techniques alone were invaluable, because by staying in practice, I have been able to use them when things about pregnancy weren't so great - like getting overly upset about confetti cannons not being readily accessible during a global pandemic...

Even when I was tired, I took time out to stretch, go for walks with our pup Hammy and the hubs, and go to the gym outside of my classes. Maybe I walked slower and less miles, but I still moved my body and THAT equates to money in the bank as far as I'm concerned.

Okay, got it. Move my body, but what does LISTENING to it mean? For me, it means taking the time to notice how your body is feeling at any particular moment, and asking yourself WHY it feels that way. Then meeting the need(s) it may be bringing to your attention.

Before I started taking my health seriously, my body felt gross all the time. I'd wake up bloated, cranky, and/or just plain blah and attributed it to that being what bodies felt like. I never gave it much thought at all. But then I started taking care of myself, eating well and adding in movement, and all of a sudden, my body stopped feeling so blah. And when I DID overindulge or stay sedentary too long, I noticed the difference. It was STARK. So, I made a note to really start noticing what my body was saying and how it was reacting to what I put it through.

THAT'S what I mean by listening to it. Your body will tell you when you need to rest. Your body will tell you when it needs something more nourishing to eat. And it will do that even (and especially) through pregnancy. And if you don't listen to it, it's message will get louder for the folks in the back, trust me.

SIDE BAR CAUTIONARY TALE: When Ryan and I went on our Babymoon, I started not feeling very great one night. Was a little dizzy. Hadn't eaten much, and definitely wasn't hydrated. I figured I'd push through so we could enjoy the fireworks display - it was July 4th after all! Well, by ignoring my body, I essentially ruined our whole evening. I was looking up at the sky to take in the fireworks and totally passed out, falling off a rock wall. I was lucky that I was aware enough to try and grab something as I came down so I scraped up my side body on the rocks instead of landing via belly flop. Both me and the baby were fine, but Ryan still has nightmares about watching me silently fall 6 feet out of nowhere. Learn from me. LISTEN TO YOUR BODY!

Go to a prenatal chiropractor

If you don't already see a chiropractor, definitely start seeing one as early as possible in your pregnancy! Your back and hips are going to ACHE, so getting (and staying) in front of alignment issues will save you a lot of pain and complications in the long run. I had been saying I'd go to a chiropractor for years, but it took getting pregnant for me to finally pull the trigger. I started going around the 10 week mark, and was found to be wayyy out of wack. I even had a dislocated rib I wasn't aware of! How does that happen?! And my hips were so off that, had I not started adjustments during pregnancy, would have caused huge issues for my desire to birth vaginally. My mom had to have a Cesarean with me because I was breech, and one of the biggest reasons that contributed to me not flipping down was because of her hip alignment! True story!

FYI - I found my chiropractor via a close friend's recommendation who is a doula and mama to three, so I HIGHLY valued her opinion. It was also important to me that whatever professional I chose was well-versed in prenatal work as well, so be sure to prioritize what you're looking for early on in your search!

Prioritize yourself

This isn't just a buzz phrase, this is real, folks. In life and in pregnancy. You CANNOT pour from an empty cup. You just can't. Maybe prioritizing yourself isn't something you've turned into a skill beforehand. That's okay. Start now. Self-care and self-compassion look different for every single person, which means it's up to you to learn what you need to feel whole and prioritized.

I need to move my body and travel. I need productivity and projects to stimulate my mind. I need detox baths and face masks and tasty comfort food and peanut butter ice cream shakes sometimes. And I knew all that before I got pregnant. What I didn't know, was how important it would be to continue infusing all of those into my daily life to stay feeling myself when I was no longer the only one in my body - and during a pandemic of all things. But, I figured it out. And you will, too, if you prioritize it and do so inclusively.

PS: If nothing else, you owe it to your baking baby to take the time it takes to care for its vessel - spoiler alert: that's YOU! Soooo... no excuses!

Involve your partner (or other support people)

This sounds like a simple no brainer, but it is ridiculously important to be intentional with this one! Pregnancy isn't an experience men go through first-hand, but in my opinion, their role can be just as important and Ryan's support/involvement always made it so much easier.

On days I wasn't my positive, happy-go-lucky self, he reminded me to fill my cup. Even though he was only able to attend ONE appointment in-person (thanks, COVID), I was able to video him in at others. And when I couldn't, he was the first person I would call on my way back to the car. The big kicker here, though, is that he WANTED to be involved. That is why he was and continues to be such a big reason why this journey has been so breezy.

It's easy for your partner to take a back seat either voluntarily or by force, but because of the strength of our relationship, that was never going to be an option for us. COVID could have made this experience even more isolating for him. However, by us taking the time to be INTENTIONAL, he was actually able to be even more involved. It's not just about him giving back rubs and fetching me another pint of ice cream (though those are important). For us (and me), it was about the joy of seeing him become a father long before we get to meet her in person. He already has a bond with Ember, and that brings me so much joy and comfort, which then adds even more to the overall journey. I don't have to worry how he is going to be as a dad, because he has been a dad this entire time. From picking the design of the nursery together, to knowing what her different kicks and movements mean, he is just as involved as me in all things Ember. How could that NOT make this experience that much better?

Become a student again

Another preface, do NOT WebMD and live on Google throughout your pregnancy. That is NOT becoming a student again. That is, instead, the quickest way to believing both you and your unborn child are dying/will die/might already be dead.

What I mean by this, is take time to find resources that align to your values and what you hope your experience to be so that you can best become educated and then empowered enough to have the most positive pregnancy possible. Knowledge is power, and you want as much of that as you can muster - especially when you don't even seem to have power over your own bladder anymore...

For me, that meant - connecting with a doula (which I am lucky enough to have an amazing one in my circle already), selectively taking some online classes since in-person options were out of the question (again, thanks, COVID!), and reading books ranging from: What to Expect When You're Expecting to Mindful Mom-to-Be and Birthing From Within. Lemme tell ya, veryyyyy different books, but each one added so much to my knowledge bank and tool kit, making me feel like I know my body and baby even more than I could have hoped for. Because of that, you won't find me Googling a random symptom or asking my Facebook Due Date group for medical advice. Again, both horrible decisions. Stick to the experts and substantiated resources.

I also talked to my amazing female village members. Yes, that led to hearing some horror stories and some advice I will definitely not be taking, but it also encouraged thought provoking discussion and learning that I wouldn't have gotten elsewhere.

No matter what "becoming a student again" looks like for you, commit and keep returning to it throughout the experience. If I had stopped at the first book and first conversation, I would not have continued to feel so at ease with my experience, and that would have definitely taken away substantially from the breeziness! It also helped me ask the right questions at my doctor appointments, so win-win!

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I can't promise that if you completely re-create these 5 things for yourself that you will have a unicorn pregnancy, too, but I truly believe they are by far and away the largest contributors (in addition to my overall positive attitude about life in general) to HOW I've had it so easy.

COVID sucks. Pregnancy can be hard. But to be honest, I am going to miss all of this so ridiculously much.

Soon, we will finally get to meet Ember, and we'll be off on the next leg of our adventure, but for now, I am going to continue sitting in my blessings of where we are, right NOW. I hope the same for you!

All my love,

Rachel